Alternatives to Violence Logo

Children and Domestic Violence

GirlCircleDomestic violence has serious, lifelong implications for our children’s future health and well-being.

When a child is exposed to the abuse of a parent, the consequences can be serious and long lasting.

Children are also negatively affected by the daily stress, uncertainty and chaos that follow the abuse. Even if a child doesn’t actually witness the abuse, knowing of the abuse can still have a powerful effect on them.

Read more: Children and Domestic Violence

Young Adults and Dating Violence

Abusive relationships have good times and bad times. Part of what makes dating violence so confusing and painful is that there is love mixed with the abuse. This can make it hard to tell if you are really being abused. Here are some good questions to ask yourself.

Does your boyfriend or girlfriend:

  • Act like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, with such sudden and extreme moods he seems like two different people?
  • Make fun of you, put you down, or embarrass you in front of other people?
  • Have a history of bad relationships or past violence, always blame his/her problems on other people, or blame you for "making" him/her treat you badly?
  • Try to get you drunk, high or messed up or try to get you alone when you don't want to be?
  • Try to control you - by being bossy, not taking your opinion seriously, making all of the decisions about who you see, what your wear, what you do, etc?
  • Talk negatively about people in sexual ways or talk about sex like it's a game or a contest?

Read more: Young Adults and Dating Violence

Are You In An Abusive Relationship?

Child Abuse

Does your partner:

  • Act extremely jealous of others who pay attention to you, or use jealousy to justify his/her actions?
  • Monitor where you go, who you call, and who you spend time with?
  • Call you names, insult you, or continually criticize you?

Read more: Are You In An Abusive Relationship?

What is Domestic Violence?

Domestic Violence is a pattern of coercive tactics abusers use to obtain and maintain control and power over their partner.

Domestic Violence is assault or threat by one family or household member (current or former) against another. Household members are defined by law as spouses, former spouses, persons who have lived together, persons who have had a child together, or persons related by blood adoption, or law.

Tactics of control include, but are not limited to: 

  • Physical abuse: pushing, pinching, hitting, biting, kicking, slapping, hair pulling, etc. 
  • Emotional and verbal abuse: put-downs, public humiliation, name-calling, mind games, manipulation, etc.
  • Isolation: moving victim away from family, not allowing victim to see family or friends, extreme jealousy, interfering with victim's ability to hold a job, etc.
  • Threats and intimidation: threats of violence against victim, relatives, pets, or property; threats of suicide; threats of taking the children, etc.
  • Sexual abuse and rape: inappropriate or unwanted sexual attention; jealously, withholding sex and affection, affairs, criticizing/minimizing partners feelings a needs regarding sex, forced sex, etc. 

Read more: What is Domestic Violence?

Who We Are

Alternatives to Violence provides assistance services at no cost to victims of domestic violence and their children in Tehama County, California.

If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, Alternatives to Violence

Call our 24-Hour Crisis Hotline at

(Toll Free: 1-800-324-6473)

or drop by our Business Center at
1805 Walnut Street in Red Bluff
during office hours (9AM - 4PM, M-F)
to discuss your options with an Advocate.


Hablamas Espanol
Services are available in Spanish


Donate safely online through PayPal:

Or by mail or in person at our Business Center:
Alternatives to Violence,
1805 Walnut Street, Red Bluff, CA 96080

To find out about donating your time as a volunteer, click here.


Login Form